The Soul Judgement...!!

-An original content By Sunil Joshan

“Hello…can you hear me...hello sirrr..?” actually no one has lifted the call itself but since she was in her trance, she didn’t accept it & so, she wiped off her shedding tears with her arms, after a few seconds she redialed it  “Hello...You Idiot...Answer me?” that phone kept unsettled, left aside and she crouched down with a burning sorrow, agony in her nerves and a kind of despair then she started yelling severely with a tighten wrists by closed, compelled eyes to express her misery and meanwhile her husband arrived & consoled her with a warm hug to his heart.

In another room of the same house, suddenly a young guy woke up, pressured his eyes with his wrists, felt very highly strung for such sort of dream. But actually, that’s not a dream since such an incident has happened a few days back when he had left his family & his sudden disappearance was backed by certain unexplained circumstances which eventually had left nothing to him except shed tears, unendurable agony to his family especially to his mother. When he opened his eyes, peered at everything that was around him under a bright light which was already got switched on and the room looks so alive & crazy with hand -made wall paintings, a collection of stickers of CR7 and photos of his younger sister Aaranya of 15 yrs old, Asher was pasted on doors, cupboards, colored windows and beautifully messed up the corner of the room filled with pairs of shoes, two footballs, shuttle rackets, cigarette beans, and all this ambiance was even more real, alive & vigorous once when it was created with a feeling of euphoria but now that aura was dissipated along with ash.

He got up, walked out of that locked room and found no one and then his eyes were in search of his parents and when he stepped outside, then he saw both of them seated in the lawn, where they usually as a family engages themselves along with friends, relatives for the sake of jollification, refreshment, etc. He stood at the door, just kept on watching them in silence, lifted his head up & the soul itself started appreciating the time by looking at moonlight and his culpable eyes got struck with a heavy load of silent tears backed with inexpiable guilty. He starts moving towards them and his ears got surprised with a howling sound filled with agony from his mid-sized Siberian husky named Asher, which was tied –up with a chain on the right side. In silence, he stood before his parents with crossed hands and listening to them…” still…I am not getting the reason for this incident??..what kind of worst things would have happened for him without our notice..?” said his mother laying on the left shoulder of his dad and his father was literally feeling the sense of utter grief in her voice and his father’s eyes which were intentionally busy with controlling emotions. That young guy had loosened his crossed hands, started hitting his face with one hand in upset & kept another hand at the waist and his inner thoughts started lambasting “I did an unpardonable mistake..No ..No…Actually, It’s more than that something I can’t bring back”.

His mother got off from the shoulder with wet eyes, started looking at his husband by holding his hand and said “Tell me Kiran, I won’t believe that fucking non-sense, scrap that others are saying about our Ajju...We knew him..Right??..Even, he knew us better”. By keeping head down, Kiran was in deep thoughts, got up from the chair, both hands locked on his back while sauntering and said “See Kavitha…whatever happened to Ajju is not a destiny, where some sort of incident happened to one person without his fault. Okay..And Here ..Ajju himself took a decision that didn’t give a chance to destiny..”

Kavitha’s trembling voice raged, yelled at Kiran and said “Absolutely wrong decision….Kiran”.  Kiran was standing there with his lifted eyebrows, watching at her face which looks so scrambled, then Kiran reached her in nervous & consoled by seating next to her and said by matching at her eyes “Kavitha, Listen to me…till now even once also, I didn’t tell you to stop being mad about our son who is actually no more….But it’s an indelible fact ..Okay ..And As a parent, we have done nothing less for him till now since his birth...He knew that how we raised him..He wouldn’t be taken such futile choice even once if he had thought of us at that time…That’s for sure...But, the fact is he left us in the dark side of the life which is inevitable to everyone…!” Kavitha was screaming by laying her forehead on his chest and Kiran felt her tears, it’s hard to comfort her but tried to keep his senses for a while and said “Aaranya is still younger, she is in complete need of us both..Okay...We need to take care of her…We still remember the moment when Ajju used to hold our fingers very tightly but now we can’t see or touch him at least..We can just feel his presence in Aaranya itself...Okay….Come on...Kavitha...Please adjust your vehemence” Kiran held her hand, drove her towards inside of the house.

By watching his parents in such a condition, even this heartless person got knelt down in the lawn, started shrieking with a feeling of contrition but here, no one was there for him at least to solace since his sobbing couldn’t reach anyone except to his pal Asher. And he looked around, then his wet eyes showed their sincere gratitude by recollecting his past priceless memories like cycle paddling for the first time guarded by his father, countless funny moments & tiny fights with his lovable sister, family gatherings and chit-chat with friends which even get involved by his father too. When his parents entered into the house, trudging towards Aaranya’s bedroom, then Kavitha felt emotional when she kept her left arm on Ajju’s photo frame &  properly arranged the fallen flower wreath.

He stood up rushed into the house, entered into the locked bedroom, which was caliginous and Kavitha was just laid upon the bed alongside Aaranya, vaguely opened windows had allowed a beam of light to reach the face of Kiran who was leaned back in a wooden deck chair & his unlocked eyes might be falling-out with his unanswered thoughts that’s why his tears were reaching down from its edges and he got accompanied by a 30 ml filled rocks glass of Chivas regal’s The Icon. Yess….even real men do cry but before reaching that every man would have done so much struggle with his mental balance & patience. Many of them would often feel that men won’t care for emotions like women but the fact is apart from being careful they do carry those hard emotions in their hearts for a long time. When this guy came out of the room, on his right he found a photo frame which was hanged to the wall and for a few seconds, he stood opposite to it, staring with unblinking eyes and out of his wrath suddenly started striking the person of the frame with his fists but that glass frame left with the same position without any piece of breakage. After a few seconds, he stepped a few steps back & turned his face to the extreme left, saw his face in the mirror which was filled with quite different emotions compared to the person’s smiling face in the frame.

By pointing a finger at the mirror, he roared and said “Bloody fucking hell, It’s not me…definitely, it’s not me...even though I am dead…I am dead…!” Yes, he was Mr. Arjun aka Ajju, the only son of a well-renowned tycoon Mr. Kiran Varma, whose family is one among those opulent families in the country. It was almost a fortnight passed since his suicide happened at a private hotel and actually there might be a meaningful rationale in his stance for that kind of decision, which looks imbecile, absurd for others but not for him at that moment of a few seconds before his death throes because they were not in his shoes and of course, whatever Arjun did was absolutely scrupulous, an intolerable thing not only for his parents even for others who knew the real essence of a gifted life and those people's shirt pockets which got backed by a strong heart, might get emptied without a single penny but filled with seeds of audacity, grit & guts and their pant pockets might not be allowed to hold money-filled wallets, ritzy gadgets but gave comfortable space to keep his hands which could do many things alone and they could find some kind of better alternatives of every worst situation which may bring an awful change in their lives but guarded by a ray of hope & a smile which is unchangeable. You may be a pauper, derelict, vagrant, a forlorn person or of any kind but you still have real life in your hands which is usually very affable & do get chilled with your way of a positive attitude.

By being a heartless person i.e. Soul, Arjun rushed into his locked room, fast trembling eyelids were in search of his old buddy Aadrika, who even got seethed and felt more dumb & numb when Ajju left without sharing a single word about such decision with it, but what else she could with an inner voice which doesn’t reach to humans. The Aardika was the name written on the diary which was presented by his father when Ajju was in mid-teenage. Since Ajju was in scurry and forcing his eyes to every corner of the room in search of Aadrika, but he didn’t find that. After a while, a voice “Hello...Ajju …where are you man..Idiot“reached him from the left where once Ajju used to keep his lappy along with his books, pencil sketches in a dark blue colored corrugated box adorned with stylish stickers of bikes, pets, superheroes.

Ajju turned to the left and started to step towards the box, when he was feet away from it  “who's the hell going to call me in this room…that human flesh has already cremated ..I am just a soul ...Am I visible to anyone ??? Hmmmm…No not at all..Yahh..No chance..!”. Again, he heard a voice “Arey..bro…Mera Yaar...Look here down”, this time it reached to him in a vivid way and then Ajju glanced into the box that was occupied with a few books, chart rolls and he took the first one from the top into his hands, which was an antique type handmade leather-bound diary layered with dust and when tried to clean the dust by his hand..”Hey, wait..”Aadrika said, when Ajju stopped do that then Aadrika asked ”Oh bro..Ajju...Are u listening to me??”Ajju was in silence aligned with a shock for a few seconds, answered “Yah..tell me…And..How could you able to speak like humans ??” that question looks so foolish to Aadrika and then she said “Come on...Ajju...We both are in the same group & of course, I am sad about that...’ coz you are not Human now…I am as a soul to this diary & You are like soul to the Human…That’s it..” Ajju had lifted the eyebrows for such words, she continued “You are the soul of Ajju, not like my buddy Ajju...I kept on calling him for many months even before his death because he left me like that without sharing, notifying…You won’t believe bro what he used to share with me… everything that comes to his mind & had special importance in his life..like his inner expressions, thoughts, every type of emotional feelings, secrets like that ..many of them..But Sometimes I do feel his writings of random thoughts, imbalanced kind of feelings which were not correct at all...But what to do, my rejection voice won’t reach to his ears ‘coz he was human...Then also I tried to convey it by warning that blank parker (pen) guy to stop spitting ink while writing..But He couldn’t stop..I didn’t get power to arise those scrappy thoughts ”After such a genuine confession from Aadrika, that guy Ajju moved to the chair, kept that diary on his opposite desk. 

His voice was not steady enough to speak but with a low tone he said “So, I made a mistake..” Aadrika replied “No..It wasn’t you..that's is Ajju..”, confused Ajju replied back, asking “ What is the difference..It was my flesh only once..right “, after a countable seconds Aadrika replied back with a gentle tone “ The difference is the matured realization that I can see which I didn’t found in Ajju even though I was with him since many years…especially during his early adulthood… Since Ajju was an introvert type of boy during his mid-teenage, he used to write all those innocent feelings, agitations, angry moments, light-hearted memories in his life...But when he was nearer to his late twenties, I had felt a sense of unusual gap in between us and there was a reason for that too…”             

Ajju interrupted & said “Listen Aadrika..as a soul to him, even I could relate to his behavior during his mid-teenage ‘coz since his heart & the mind was completely pure and genuine where a soul can live...But later as you said, I too didn’t found any sort of a feeling or a kind of positivity from his heart...A person with a golden heart is born out of pure soul which resides with kids & dead people. ..and that’s why people pay respect to a dead person…And here, in his late twenties his thoughts, actions were might be unstable, incorrect and his mind might be started filling with hatred, greedy, negativity, sinfulness by losing its serenity. It’s a state where a soul doesn’t exist.”

As a diary, Aadrika knew the mindset, personality of Arjun and confessed the behavioral nature of Arjun, from his view with the soul. After a considerable gap in between them, Aadrika said ” so bro..so when you stopped to exist in him, that means he started as habitual nature of committing irregular actions, intolerable mistakes, addiction to his bad habits, etc. which eventually drove him to a stage of having a mindset occupied with complete loneliness, extreme levels of inner inhibitions, intrusive thoughts ..And Aadrika means The Mountain…and the intention behind naming this label on me, presenting to Ajju was to feel like a Mountain, which stood as a sign for its nature of unflinching attitude that’s backed by the manful, dauntless type of mindset and at the same time staying being gentle..But here that’s doesn’t happen with Ajju ….”

The soul replied by saying “All these bunch of emotions were not only resolved by money itself, even it required personal care, unconfined love & affection from their closed ones viz. parents, friends, siblings… But when it doesn’t happen at the right time then that led to suicides …Especially in case of a person, from the stage of his childhood to adulthood, they should be taught, educated about various ways of leading a happy & a self-comfortable lifestyle which could be in terms of accepting healthy education, keeping sincere relentless efforts, ignoring the expectations, self-belief, self-control, instilling helping nature & gratitude towards others, stable mindset but couldn’t be defined in terms of lavish nature of money, addiction to invaluable things, oppressing nature, etc.”

This kind of discernment from the soul (Ajju) is like a life chapter for every young person like Ajju, who had lately realized the value of real-life when he met the emotions of his parents after his suicide which was useless at all but an indelible loss to all. And even parents can be held accountable for these kind goofs as and when they leave the children to choose their choices instead of guiding them. Here, in the life of Ajju, his soul came after his death and gave its judgment to his living character, but it couldn’t happen with us after our demise ‘coz we are living with a society where almost everything got connected with mainly three interrelated things i.e. Money, Stature of the Person, Greediness. Let the destiny to decide your life end, till then strive to do all those things that the soul said as its judgment.

……Sincerely Thank You for  Reading..(A Fiction Based Story)…..